RELIEF FROM RESOLUTIONS

New Year's Resolutions rarely last beyond the month of January because they lack true intent. The good intentions expressed with the new beginnings of a calendar year are rationalized away or forgotten are most often things that we "should" either start doing or stop doing. But unless there is a strong desire and commitment, change will not occur. 

Resolutions and goals have several things in common, but also several differences.

Both indicate a desired and measurable result. Both have the capacity to enhance self esteem and a sense of accomplishment. But that is where the similarities end.

With a resolution, there is a desire for the result but usually not the process required to get there. When the process holds no charm, it takes an enormous amount of self discipline to follow through with consistency. As coaches, we often find that considering other options of process can be helpful, but only if the desire for change is valid.

Goals however, are designed to fit into your vision and mission. Goals, in order to be realistic, must be do-able, or there is a sense of failure if they are not achieved.
Short term goals can be stepping stones to larger ones and can often be benchmarked with an action plan that is tied to either a timeline or cost. If the process is seen as 
part of the journey that is enjoyable, it will likely be achieved.

Another important difference is the perception of the vision. If you say you resolve to lose twenty pounds, visions of dry toast, carrot sticks and treadmills may come to mind,along with all the reminders of how much you dislike dieting and/or working out.  If however, you set a goal to move from wearing a Large size to a Medium, there is a vision of the result that is pleasurable because you will be happier with your appearance and/or your energy when that is achieved. How we perceive a project makes a difference in how we perceive the process.

If you really don't want to do something, you won't do it. So release yourself from the resolutions that seemed like great ideas a couple of weeks ago and settle into some realistic goals that will make a difference. JS


KEY QUESTIONS:

1. As yourself: What do I really, really want? How much, on a scale of 1-10?

2. Is the result a necessary part of your life vision?

3. Is it compatible with your life vision?